Bob: Hey, can you help me? Joe: Here, have some tissue. Bob: Thanks... Just a sec., give me minute. Kelly: Are you OK? Bob: Wait, almost there. Kelly: Well, hurry up, there's a baby girl starving to death here. Bob: May I refer you to passage 4:94 where God states quite clearly... Kelly: Don't. Just feed her. Bob: Me? Why not you? You're the one with the breasts. Kelly: HEY! Have you ever heard of women's lib? You know, like equal rights, etc... Bob: OK, OK. Give me a sec. Where's the nipple? Ok, there it is. Here you go... Cha cha cha... Baby Girl (Samantha): Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Bob: Shhh... Time to eat. Mmmmm Nipple! Yummy yummy yummmy good for your tummy. Taste the salty goodness. Kelly: You're supposed to be soothing her, Bob. Joe: He IS soothing her! Coochie coohie coo! Cables... Stinking drunk! Marc Almond! Sam: WAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Bob; Oh, SMEG. Here... Rockabye baby in the treetop... Sam: GURGLE... URGH... aheh.... WAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Joe: Shhhh. Yummy lunch! Today, for your treat, BOB NIPPLE! Yum... yum! ... Two years later... Sam: WAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahaha! Oops: Author's mistake! 20 years later! Sorry! Sam: You and you. To the banquet hall. You and you. Cover the stairs. You and you... Er, eat, drink and be merry. You and you: GO GO GO! You and you: You and you in place. Awaiting further instructions. Sam: Hold until my mark. You and you: Cha, Cha Cha, Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha. You and you (all the men, it's a sexist world out there, folks): May we have sex with you, sir? Sam: Not until five minutes before the closing credits. And even then, all you're guaranteed is a smooch. You and you (yes, YOU too): Oh, SMEG. Sam: And only if it directly affects the plot. Or will get the fathers to see the movie. Either one. Just call me SHOWGIRL!!! You, you, and me: Yeah! Take it all off! Sam: Do you really think I should? Us: Trust us! Sam: OK, well here goes... Them: Wow! What a body! The dads in the audience: Oh my lord! The censors: We can't censor this! THIS is ART! The Author: Thank you, thank you. I couldn't have done it without your imagination. So, everyone, lets all give a warm Adventures In Greece welcome to... Mr. Imagination! Mr. Imagination: Hey, it's great to be here. You're all such wonderful people! As if you needed me to tell you that, haha! Hey, I accept this award, but don't thank me! I owe everything to you! Give yourselves a big hand! Sam: What about me? Mr. Imagination: And a warm welcome to the good looking naked chick! MPAA: This is going to be R rated, isn't it? Author: No! you can't do that! Not in my moment of triumph! Besides, this play has already been rated "NOT RATED". You can't take away my revenue! MPAA: 200 bucks. Under the table. And not a word of this to anyone! Author: Deal. MPAA: OK, It's signed in blood then. Author: Hey, all you AIG fans!